there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
These tits shall not be calmed
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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