I hate all girls vehemently.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize