he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
