Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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