If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
