they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize