just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
