her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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