Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
