I'm eating all of the evidence.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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