my mouth tastes like poor choices
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
