i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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