I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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