I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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