So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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