ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
