Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
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