You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
