he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
