Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
