Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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