I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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