Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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