Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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