They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
worst night to have a conscience
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Randomize