im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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