it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
