THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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