how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Randomize