Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize