I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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