this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
