No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
