I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
