i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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