Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
