Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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