Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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