dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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