Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
