I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
