my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
