yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
It's Friday. Sex?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
