Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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