People in love make me want to vomit
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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