I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
