Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
