you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
