I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
