i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
