How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
